COOLEGE

Getting to college and being admitted to your dream college is a dream for every senior high school student. My dream was to enter at University of the Philippines.

It didn't happen.

I was devastated to know about it since my brother passed his UPCAT exams during his time and was depressed for quite sometime. But my mother told me that I could just transfer to UP next year, I just need to study very well and do my best. That I did.

I studied at Saint Louis University Baguio during my first year in college. One word that I could say to this place is: Cold. Baguio is known for its weather and I could really attest to that. I worked hard on my studies and was ready for anything while I was in Baguio. I was so focused on my aim that I became less and less sociable and just stayed in the library and study or do projects.

I was a..nerd or geek during that time and I was unfazed. I also had this competitive streak to get what I want even if it entails hardships and trials. No guy got interested in me during that time because they were more interested in my other batch mates who were prettier than me. I didn't have any problem with it because I was focused on getting to UP next year and living my dream.

But of course, I did find sometime to look at guys while at Baguio. He was our neighbor and a friend of my brother (my brother studied at UP Baguio and when news came that I passed at SLU well it was a relief for my parents because I have someone who'll look out on me), and has the same faith as I do. He's so kind and such a gentleman that it was easy to like him. Also he was cute in his boyish way. He is taking up BS Mathematics which entails he is smart at something I hate.

But there is one thing that may be the make or break of this; He acts so feminine that I wonder if he is gay or otherwise. Trust me even my brother is questioning it because there were times when at night , my brother and I are busy with our own business and he and his other friends would stay late at night and just talk and laugh all night long. And his laugh makes me want to go out and ask him straight on We code named him as "Gay Dude".

Don't get me wrong, if he comes out as gay then I will respect his decision. Hurt, yes. Sad, yes but not angry. But if he is bisexual then there may be a chance. But I think he is straight just acts like that. Like me who acts all boyish when I like guys too. There may be a chance!

When I left I didn't get a chance to say goodbye or see him that time because well we are only an acquaintance and I don't want people to know I was leaving.

Being in Baguio, I get to see how my relationship with my brother and basically my family is to me. My brother has this anger/stress issue that he seldom throws at me and I get hurt pretty easily. In times I get hurt I just tell my problems to my best friend Christine and she would be there to comfort me.

Me and Sweetcheeks

Christine. I call her Sweetcheeks now because every time she is stressed out or embarrassed she would go red in the cheeks. She and I became friends because of studies and the fact that she is near my rental home and how she basically toured me around Baguio made of bond stronger. We had some fights here and there but we never broken our friendship. She grew up differently than I do. I grew up with a better lifestyle than she but that didn't compromise our friendship. She never asked money from me and I will treat her because I want to not because I pity her.

Without her, I may not be where I am today because she thought me lessons that I couldn't get from other people. Of course there is Noelyn, who is also a great friend to me and a confidant but since she is studying BS Mathematics and me studying Bachelor of Library and Information Science, we never hang out much. But there were times, while I was a freshman (again) in UP where I would talk to her and have a long conversation about anything under the sun.

Christine and I have one thing in common that instantly sealed our friendship. She loves reading as much as I do. She read self help books and fiction while I read fantasy and fiction. Every break or lunch time we always go to the fiction area of the library and read to our hearts delight.

During my stay at Baguio, I grew to love writing. With all of my pent up emotions, writing was a good way to go. It started out as an activity in my English class in the first semester that we should write a journal that talks about our daily activities. I did well on that activity and continue to write even if its not needed anymore. I saw it as the cheapest therapy there is. On the second semester, we had another English class but this time we were required to write a story or poem about anything under the sun with the list of words provided. I did well in the activity and was encourage to continue my story.

I did.